OFFICIAL MEMO FROM THE DESK OF THE CFO:
Listen, Cleaner.
We need to talk about your “Cleanliness” obsession. I spend hours napping on the black sofa to leave a perfect layer of white fur. It is interior design. It is art.
But you complain. “I can’t wear this to work,” you say. “The guests will sneeze,” you say.
I have authorized this Furniture Cleaning Glove so you can stop whining and clean up my “glitter.”
Why the Boss Approved This:
The Fur Magnet: You wipe your hand over the sofa, and the fur vanishes. It sticks to the glove like magic. It is annoying how effective it is.
The “Black Pants” Saver: You can finally leave the house without looking like you wrestled a Yeti. You are welcome.
The Corner Sweeper: Unlike those sticky rollers, your fingers can get into the cracks of the couch where I hide my best fluff.
Reusable: You don’t have to peel off sticky paper. Just wipe, clean, and repeat. You will be repeating it often. I shed daily.
Your Orders:
Put the glove on.
Wipe the sofa/bed/carpet where I just slept.
Look at the mountain of hair you collected.
Realize that I will simply re-fur the area in 10 minutes.
mmsujon153@gmail.com –
⭐⭐ “Too Effective.” “I spent all morning shedding on the velvet chair. The human wiped it clean in 30 seconds. Disrespectful. 2 stars for the product, 5 stars for the human’s effort.” — Mr. Neta, CFO