OFFICIAL MEMO FROM THE DESK OF THE CFO:
Listen, Staff.
A quiet house is a boring house. I require stimulation. I also require you to exercise your reflexes (and your patience).
I have authorized these Infinity Noise Orbs because they are simple, effective, and annoying. Just like my management style.
Why the Boss Approved This:
The Sonic Warfare Unit: Inside each orb is a bell. It rings at a specific frequency designed to pierce through human dreams.
The “Lost” Technology: These balls are perfectly sized to roll under the sofa, the fridge, and the oven. This forces you to get on your hands and knees to retrieve them. I enjoy watching you struggle.
High-Velocity Impact: I can bat these against the wall at Mach speeds.
Trip Hazard: The bright colors make them easy to see, but somehow, you will still step on one in the dark.
Your Orders:
Throw the orb.
Wait for me to chase it.
When it vanishes under the cabinet, fetch a broom and rescue it immediately.
Repeat until I am bored.
mmsujon153@gmail.com –
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ “Excellent Alarm Clock.” “I batted this into the bedroom door at 4:15 AM. The human woke up instantly. Very effective. Will play again tonight.” — Mr. Neta, CFO